After the traumatic results of the previous Satirical Knights Live episodes, the Doctor decided to judiciously pre-screen all future SKL interviewees. The new strategy was fairly simple: send out polite emails to prospective candidates explaining the cultural significance of SKL while soliciting their participation. The first response to the open cast call was none other than Gordon Gekko, the world’s most famous corporate raider and stock market manipulator of Wall Street fame.
The Doctor was initially ecstatic to hear from Gordon, assuming his endorsement would be worth its weight in gold – after all, the man’s words are cast in stone. Unfortunately, all did not go as anticipated as is evident from his response posted below.
Dear Dr. StrangeJob,
OK sport, you got my attention. You have what it takes to get into my inbox, but do you have enough to stay? I did a quick review of your portfolio and, to be honest, it is crap. Your website is mundane, your Facebook page is stagnant, and your Twitter feed is practically non-existent. Frankly, you suck. However, there is one piece of your portfolio that could be a serious money-maker. The 12+1 Steps of Incompetents Anonymous scheme has potential to be worth millions in royalty and franchise fees.
I look at a hundred deals a day and pick one. I pick only winners, and today is your day. Unfortunately for you, it appears that you have neglected to legally register the Dr. StrangeJob name, website, domain name, and Twitter feed. Fortunately for me, my legal team recently acquired all legal rights to Dr. StrangeJob and all of its derivatives, including Satirical Knights Live and Incompetents Anonymous. My lawyers will be contacting you within 48 hours. They will be forwarding legal documents outlining our formal takeover of the Dr. StrangeJob brand. If you choose not to sign the agreement, then you will be served a cease and desist order.
One more thing. Stop confusing me with that DaCrapio kid that fancies himself a wolf of wall street. He still has a lot of growing pains to get through before he can order a Greco, let alone a Gekko.
Ouch! It’s starting to look like there’s some sort of curse on the Doctor’s SKL series. First he pissed off the Dude, then he was threatened by the Psychotic Forrest Ranger, and now he is being sued by Gordon Gekko. Maybe it’s all about the bucks. The point is that greed, for lack of a better word, seems to work for many. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that 1% of the world’s population own half of the world’s wealth. The Doctor will need to pull a Charlie Sheen to get out of this one, but defeat is not an option. It might take some tiger blood to make a winner out of the Doctor, but until then, funny never sleeps.
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